Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Jealous?



Jealousy.

A pesky little word that holds a lot of negative power. It can create breakups, hate, fear, anger, depression, crush families and possibly drive one insane. It can suck the energy from you and cause a distraction from you achieving your goal. 

It makes you question--Why do they have a bigger house? Better car? Why is she prettier? How come I can't write like that? Why didn't I think of that idea? How can she handle her demands of being a wife, and mother and still meet her goals?You get the the picture. The grass is always greener on the other side.

This word has poked it's way into my subconscious now and again.  Really, name one person who has not felt this. It hurts you deep down and your face burns as it grows but how you release it is key. As I have gotten older, I have learned how to channel this negativity.  Sure growing up I have totally disliked some folks because they seem so perfect but are they? Everyone has faults--you may not see them.

I have learned to not put hate towards whatever I'm jealous at but to turn it into something more powerful--motivation. Writing has opened its doors for me to do this. I know I'm not the best writer out there (I'm learning) but turing the power of jealousy into motivation can be --well --powerful. It drives you to not only prove to yourself but to others that you can do this--watch me.  You will fall and doubt will try and drive you away from doing what you love but others will remind you that you need to continue and that power you store inside will take over.

My favorite way to release jealousy--write it into my story.  I love, love-- should I say it again-- love putting my MCs through conflict and torture.  Just to see how much pain they can endure.  Jealousy can help that.  Just as in real life it produces great love triangles, family quarrels, friendships severing, need I go on. You need conflict in a great story so go and write some.

So I ask you--

How do you handle jealousy?

Do you love putting your MC's thorough conflict?

What motivates you to write conflict?

Have you had a bad experience from being jealous?

Thought I would put a rise in you.

I'm trying to visit all of my new followers so please be patient.  The next couple of weeks will be hectic for me.  I have a goal to finish some revisions, critiques need to be done and my son's surgery is next week. Oh yeah and I have to work (at my other job). So keep checking on me I will not let you down.  I need to learn how to stay up all night and not get tired.  Wait --Edward dear, I need your help. :)

***Last reminder sign up for my contest***  The winner will be announced tomorrow.  Good Luck!
 Click here to enter and see the prizes.

Get over to Lisa and Laura's blog--500 follower contest--You know it's good.

Have a great day!

18 comments:

  1. Ahh jealousy that one's tough. Luckily it has not given me too much trouble over the years I do love how you handle it though! Writing it in a story is a fantastic idea! I would say when it comes my way I normally talk it out with the hubby and then forget about it, it's really the only release I have when it rolls around to bother me!

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  2. Jealousy... such a bad, dirty word. But I find that sometimes jealousy is the best motivator for me. Maybe I'm just weird. :)

    Happy Wednesday!!

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  3. I have self esteem issues, so when I see someone has what I want (which can be many things. Even better cookies), I just figure I don't deserve it, or would do something bad with it, anyway. I used to be pretty and now I'm not. I'm sort of glad for this. I was so hateful when I was pretty. Now I'm just sardonic. :-)

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  4. Ooh man, jealousy. If I could remove ONE emotion from myself, that would be it. I, having decided from an early age that I wanted to be either a rockstar or a famous writer, have grappled with that word a lot.

    But you're right about the motivation being the best way to deal with it. Sort of like the "happiness is the best revenge" thing.

    Haha, I actually just now am making a character jealous of another character as a way to show her that she's romantically interested in someone. ;-)

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  5. Jealousy--that's a tough one. It's even worse to hear people who are jealous talk about the object of their jealousy. I like your idea of therapy-through-writing!

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  6. I love the therapy through writing thing, like Betty. I think I do that a lot. Jealousy is an ugly thing, I try not to be it's victim, but of course I am sometimes, probably a lot of the time.

    Great post!! Inspiring!

    And Christine, you are an AMAZING writer! Just sayin :)

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  7. I agree that jealousy is a great motivator ... as long as you don't let it get too out of control. Great post!

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  8. Great topic. Who hasn't experienced jealousy? You're right -- it's such a strong emotion that can drive us to do so many things.

    Luckily, I haven't experienced it much in the writing world, so I consider this kind of my safe haven, where I actually have healthy self-esteem. Sure, I'd love to be the next [insert successful author's name here] and I wish I could write as well as some of my blog friends, but I wouldn't wish them less success, or wish to be better than them.

    Outside the writing world... well, I always wish I could be prettier/smarter/more popular than I am. But I love channeling those feelings into my characters! Jealousy makes the plot go 'round. :)

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  9. Wow. I'm so impressed by you being able to channel all the negativity into something good and motivational. I'm still working on that. :)

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  10. Jealousy has pulled me in good directions, and bad. I try to focus it into good things these days, but that can be difficult sometimes. I love that picture! Hehehe. :)

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  11. Ha! That picture is awesome!
    I have a character in my WIP who is a jealous little jerk. It adds a nice amount of conflict

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  12. I've worked really hard to not let my jealousy get the best of me. It's definitely one of those things that everyone feels, no one wants to admit to, and can do more damage than most other negative emotions.

    I don't utilize jealousy too much in my writings. I prefer to torment my characters in other, less obvious ways. Writing is an amazing catharsis and even if the conflict doesn't make it to the final cut, it's provided me with a way to channel my pain. It comes out of me and bleeds into the story and I find it's much easier to deal with that way.

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  13. I try really hard to banish jealousy the second it rears its ugly head. It's nothing but negative energy and being jealous of someone won't make me have whatever it is I want that's making me jealous. Instead, I dedicate myself to doing it better! :D

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  14. Jealousy/ lack of trust is a HUGE issue for my MC. I am not unlike her in that I occasionally feel the pangs of envy. I agree writing about the green monster is awesome -- and calming, in a way.

    Great post today, Christine!

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  15. I gave up being jealous a long time ago. It never got me anywhere. However one of the secondary characters in my WIP was jealous and caused a whole lot of heartache.

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  16. Jealousy is a tough one, but I've found that the more I take time to be thankful for what I have, the less jealous I am of others. Seriously, I've started counting my blessings pretty regularly, and it's made a big difference on my entire outlook.

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  17. Oh yeah! I love to write jealous characters. They're a blast. Especially a character who is jealous and says what he/she thinks.

    The jealousy line on my palm goes clear up my index finger, so I know I have to be cautious and I've learned to be genuinely happy for others successes. That helps a lot. :)

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  18. I can only compare myself to myself. I can't compare myself to others. Once that happens, jealousy happens.

    No room for it in my life. It's negative energy. I don't need it because it clouds my mind.

    I can say that I have learned there are always going to be people with more than I have in life, but there are far more who have less. I am a very fortunate and blessed person.

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