Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Which road will you take?

Most of my life I have been a quiet, shy girl. I never wondered why things happen they just did and I thought I would grow up, get married, have a couple of kids, maybe work a little and live life--like my mom. Not that there is anything wrong with my mom's life. I thought --"that's what I should do." I went to college for something I thought I loved but really I just like it and it gets me by.

 But why did I think this? I realize now that it's not me.

My best friend stresses that everything happens for a reason. Whether good or bad--it happens and you may or may not know right away-- why.

I sort of believed her but it wasn't until recently that I really believed her.

Last year, I started my current WiP. Why did I start it then? Why not 11 years ago when I started doodling ideas down on paper just to get them out of my head?

Beacuse I wasn't ready.

It took me 11 years to gain confidence, take criticism, and be the person I am now. There are some days, I wish I figured out how much I loved writing and went to college for something writing related. Would I be farther than I am now? I don't know.

I feel like my age (o.k. I'll tell ya 36) is part of it. Approaching 40 makes me feel sick at times --I have a fear of getting old. Yes, I know weird--right? Don't we all have this feeling? :) It made me look back and think of how stupid I was but showed me why my life took the path it did. I had many opportunites that would have sent me on a detour--on a different path but I refused to take them. Why? Sometimes I wonder where I would be today if I did. Would I be in a better position in the writing world? Instead of trying to gain the respect of other writers and working extra hard to make my writing better--would I already be there? Would I already be published?

Then I looked hard and really looked at certain pieces of my life--- I see why things happened.  I went college for interior design so I could gain confidence in myself, to be more outgoing and learn how to market myself.

Having kids has made me a little more patient--just a little. They provide me with love and the motivation to write. I want to show them that no matter what-- you can try to accomplish any goal no matter what age.

I married my hubby because he is a wonderful man and does push me to do what I believe in.

I also realize I don't want to live my life with regret. Like I have said before, I have a few but I must hurdle over them and move ahead. Regrets only slow you down.

I know that I'll write till the creativity that runs in my veins is drained. Till there is nothing left. (that's not including when Edward changes me into a vampire). :) Sorry I always have vampires on the brain. 

Ahem! I'll continue...and whether or not I get published (although I really, really want to one day. Who doesn't, right?)

There are many roads for our journey and you must be able to read the signs that are right for you. The signs that lead you to happiness.

Where is your road leading you?

Do you believe things happen for a reason?

How do you get over regrets?

What has made you realize that writing is your passion?

I don't have the secret formula on figuring this out. Hey, it has taken me 36 years to figure out this much.

Happy writing and have a great day!


  1. All the paths I have taken, be they good, bad or indifferent, have led me to this place, right here, with two partials out and 11 queries still unanswered. Monster Baby is healthy, we have a nice home, and the ex- is gone for good. It doesn't make sense to have regrets, there's nothing you can do about the past except try and not make the same mistakes in the future.

    And writing has always been my passion. I have never wanted to be anything other than a writer/author. It just took a while for my dreams to manifest. Patience. Good things come to those who wait.

  2. I love this post.

    What has made me realize that writing is my passion? Because I get up everyday at 5 am even though I don't have do. Okay, I'm not writing at 5 am like I used to. I'm blogging, but I'm also hunting for great writing advice and networking. All important for my writing.

    I hope my road is eventually leading to publication. But in the meanwhile, it's led me to some great writer friends and I've honed my writing skills (and I don't just mean my fiction writing skills). All of these things are important. Plus, I've developed the courage to take risks, to allow for rejections. I'm definitely not my mother. ;)

  3. I very strongly believe that everything happens for a reason. And if someone gave me the opportunity to go back in time to "fix a mistake" or something, I would adamantly refuse out of fear that I would come back to a different life, when I love the life I have right now so dearly.

    I started writing when I was 9, so I can't really remember what got me started. All I know is that as soon as I started, I never stopped. I slowed down in college due to overload, but I never stopped completely, and I doubt I ever will. Publishing would be awesome, but it's not my all-consuming drive. All I want out of my life is happiness with my husband and a fleet of good cats and dogs. :-)

  4. I love this post, and I really like Summer's comment too.

    I absolutely believe that things happen for a reason. I think that sometimes we don't always figure out what our passion is right away, because we need to have those little stepping stones along the way to get us there. That make us into the person we need to be to live our dream.

  5. I strongly believe that each day, each moment is a decision. I can choose whether or not to go to work, and suffer the consequences of either choice. I can choose to write or sit and watch a movie (the latter of which has been my choice the last few weeks). There is no end to the journey, only the journey itself. Events are not the only things that shape us. It is our reaction to events, and the choices we make.

  6. I always wonder why I didn't start writing sooner, but like you I wasn't ready. I believe I started when I did for a reason. And it was at a life changing age for me as well (around 30). I looked back at my life and said, "What's missing?" And then I started to write :)

  7. I'm right with you...when I was 12 I had a wonderful teacher that pushed me to pursue writing and I was gung-ho for it until I hit my late teens. seventeen and eighteen....I often wish I had started earlier, or wonder why, or think where I could be...but I agree, it will drive you crazy and so true that we do it when we do for a reason. :0)

  8. Great post, Christine. I totally believe things happen for a reason and sometimes it's not up to us to know why the things happen. I've learned throughout these past couple of years that before I truly understand something, there is usually a lesson that must be learned first (be it patience, motivation, determination, faith, etc). I know we've talked about this before, but I too wish that I would have discovered this passion when I was in school and would have taken some classes- oh well. My degree has helped me in other areas of my life and the cool thing about school is that you are never to old to go back!

  9. Yeah, I sure am a devoted believer in 'everything happens for a reason', because I've seen how horrible things end up taking me in good directions.

    Where is my road leading me? Um, I have no idea. Hopefully that's the point. There is a road I'd like to follow, but I guess I can't determine whether I'll get what I want.

    How do I get over regrets? Hmm, I'd like to say I don't have any. But what I should say is that I try not to have any. I move forward and enjoy the now.

    What has made me realize that writing is my passion? Well, I feel the happiest when I'm writing. I feel lost when I'm not. I guess that's a pretty good sign! :)

    Great post, Christine. Thanks.

  10. Yeah, I absolutely believe things happen at their own pace and time. Four years ago I wouldn't have been in the frame of mind to sit and dedicate myself to this WiP. There were things I had to live and learn before I could start this journey. Oddly, my story is about the course of a persons life, destiny/fate, if you want to call them that and how it can be altered. Going fork in the road left or right, which one leads where etc.
    Regrets, well I have a few I'm not one that says I live without them, but I try to embrace them as just having lived a not so awesome moment and learning from it. Sometimes easier said.
    Great post!

  11. oh i think this is so true. I have a BA in creative writing and yet i didn't get really serious about it until about a year ago (and i'm approaching 30)

    i just wasn't ready yet to be serious about it

  12. ...despite the many setbacks I've been dwelt, I'm a firm believer that everything happens for a reason.
    Pitfalls, if studied after the fact and thought upon with a clear head, really can build one's determination.
    ...thoroughly enjoyed reading this post, Christine. ...and a funny thing, I'm also 36:) Long live the 90's!

  13. I'm a lot like you. I wasn't ready to write in my 20s. I needed time to find myself and experience life before I was able to put it on paper. Even then, I had much to learn about writing.

  14. I definitely believe things happen for a reason. As for regrets, if you believe everything happens for a reason, why have them? Even the mistakes get you further along your path. In fact, I make a point of letting my children make mistakes - they're the best way to learn.

  15. Very well said, Christine. And hey - nothing wrong with 36! That's my age, too! :)

    There are so many factors that led me to writing, but I think you need to be in the right place to recognise them and react to them.

  16. It's the things we didn't do rather than what we did that we regret.
    And you're right - sometimes we just aren't ready. But when we are, we need to go for it.

  17. This post really resonated with me, though I certainly haven't figured out as many things as you do yet. When it comes to writing, I have a lot of regrets; I will always wonder: What if I had started earlier? A way to overcome it is to focus on the future, because I do not want to waste the next 10 years the way I did the last 10. :)

  18. What Susan and Summer said! I wouldn't change much of my life, even the really ugly, sad parts.

    I enjoyed this thoughtful post. :)

  19. What a great post. You are so right--you've got to go for it. We only get one go-around. All of our past contributes to who we are now.

  20. Life is really a journey with highs and lows, good choices and bad choices. I've made my share of bad choices, but choosing to write has never been one of them. Though, there have been days when a rejection hurts more than it should. Still, it's been a great ride so far. Great post!

  21. Beautiful post! Such a great window into who you are, Christine. I am so many things and have taken so many paths that I figure at the very least it has given me ammunition to write with. :o)

    It's about like hiring professors right out of college. When I was still a student and then a professor, I always noticed that they made the worst teachers because they weren't speaking from experience but rather from a textbook.

    Writing without authority or experience just isn't the same as writing with those years of LIFE behind you. So it's wonderful that you can embrace it! I will try to too!

  22. I've always thought things happen for a reason, but then I also wonder if we twist what's happened round to fit our current situations or objectives. We can always find some kind or sign or reason in our past events.
    I liked your thoughts on this.

  23. Three years older than you (will be 39 next month), and the one thing life has taught me is that things happen for a reason. When you are at a fork, choose the one you think is right for you, and never look back. Things normally work out fine in the end.

    Lovely post.