Monday, February 27, 2012

Simple Pressure

One of my favorite quotes.

Every aspect of life has pressures. Some feel like an elephant resting on our shoulders and some are just a simple press on our chest. Writing does not escape this. Some folks (who are not writers) would probably disagree, but like with anything, you don't know till you walk in the other person's shoes.

Lately, a simple pressure is starting to grow. Parts of me are excited that I may actually finish this manuscript and send it off. The other parts (like many of you) have the heavy weight pressing on my head. It's that moment of the unknown and the what ifs.

What if I send this out and nothing happens?

What if all I get are rejections and no interest?

That last question is what's starting to haunt me. It's the part where I can't compare myself to others, and focus on believing in me. It may not happen this round and I've sort of tried to psych myself into thinking that. It doesn't mean it won't sting if no one even asks for a partial.

But what if they don't? Sure I will feel defeated and ashamed, maybe embarrassed to face my writer friends, but I have to hold my head up and deal. It's not failure (that's what I keep telling myself). It simply means it wasn't my time.

The part I have to remember is that I've tried and if nothing happens, I'll have to try again.

Of course, I have to try first. Can you tell I'm scared to death to step into the land of query? Sure I've said it before and I'm sorry I keep saying it, but it's what's on my mind today. I'm sure all you guys want is for me to query so I'll shut up about it. :)

What are your biggest fear/pressures in writing?

Have a great day!

10 comments:

  1. My biggest fear in writing is getting it right. Getting the story right. Getting the words rights. :)

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  2. 'If' is not conducive to productivity. :D It's okay to wonder. The trick is to let that word help you dream and forge ahead, not lag behind.

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  3. Well, at least you are playing the "what if" game. I was so cocksure my book was going to be accepted I had no room for failure. And then when it wasn't, well, that just about suffocated me.

    But you have to try. Put it this way, if you wanted to make a souffle and never made one before and your husband wanted it too, wouldn't you attempt to make it? And if it came out all flat, you'd reread the recipe and try it again. And quite possibly again until the souffle came out perfect.

    Well, writing is a lot like a souffle. But you won't know you can make one until you try.

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  4. I never really understood what "Keep swimming" meant until I was a writer. It'd be so easy to give up, but I just can't allow myself to.

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  5. I totally *get* the fear and I'm with you. It's like this thing constantly hanging over my head as I work on my latest WIP...all the time and effort I've put in and the real question in the end is: Will it be worth it? Will it be good enough?

    Then I remember, even if it's not, I couldn't NOT write. There's something about it that comforts me in a way nothing else does. :)

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  6. I LOVE that Thomas Edison quote. Very true indeed!

    Christine, I think we're all afraid to fail at some point. But when the alternative is to give up and stop trying ... I think the writer part of ourselves wrestles the fear to the ground and pins it to the mat. Because we can't stop telling stories. Not ever.

    Pressure for me? Going from a small, new publisher to one with a distinguished reputation and some big name authors -- and hoping I can measure up. It still scares me.

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  7. One of my favorite sayings right now is "If you are not willing to look stupid, nothing great is ever going to happen to you."

    Stepping out and risking may end up in you looking stupid... but it might also end up with really great things happening. :)

    But nothing will happen with no risk.

    Jo
    In Which We Start Anew

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  8. oh, the idea of rejection makes my blood run cold. But nothing ventured, nothing gained. Right?

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  9. I get this so much. Sometimes I worry that I've become so comfortable with being a writer working on her first novel that I'm too afraid to move on.

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  10. Wow that's a killer quote and really makes you think about not giving up!

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