I am not a very patient person. I try my hardest but most of the time deep down I am screaming to keep going --move on. A lot of people who do know me say I am a patient person but when I want to do something and something is blocking my way my eyes shoot fire and my throat lets out a growl.
So here I am learning to fight the impatience that tortures me. I am impatient right now because it feels like my first draft is taking an eternity to get out of my head. The three chapters I wrote last week have just sat there waiting --waiting for me to continue. I want to write the rest but then real life tends to block my hand as it approaches the keys. I am sitting here typing this with one hand so my son can sleep on the other. I have to soak in this moment though because I know one day when he is in his teens he will not want to have anything to do with me. I guess I fear that if there is a window of oppourtunity for me I may miss it. I can't worry about this I know but it is always stuck back there in my mind.
That means time management and yes-- to be patient.
One day this novel may become something-- who knows --but I have to realize that this it is not a race. It is not how fast I can crank it out to ease my impatience but how well I can do it. I want to write something that is from me --the me who is patient.
Does anyone else get impatient or anxious? How do you deal with it?
