Blinders

School is starting soon! Well for my kids at least. And yes, I'm excited. My schedule will be back. I can breathe. I love my kids tons, but I need some writing time. The one thing that's hard is blocking that little thing called the internet. It's pesky, isn't it. It teases and looks so inviting, but you must look away and not be tempted. It can be a total distraction, which leads to no time to develop a story. So what do you do when you're stuck on an manuscript problem and you see an email pop up only to learn that it was an advertisement, but it made you think about another social site that you need to check to see if so and so got a book deal? Shut it off. You heard me. I see your eyes are bulging and you're hyperventilating. It's not the end of the world. Seriously.

It seems like we get all our info off of social media (including yours truly). It can be addicting and totally put you off your game. Not only is it sucking up time and keeping you away from creating, it can damage your self esteem. How? As happy as I can be for others when they triumph, it can hurt a little if you have nothing to say about numero uno. In your mind, you may think you're making no progress because there's nothing new with you. But understand everyone is at a different level. They all are traveling down different paths at their own pace, and so are you. Stop and take a look around you, at you. Have I learned this lesson over and over? Yes, but it's worth repeating because we get stuck into the everyday hum drum and it may feel like you're going no where, but everyone else is miles ahead. Bologna. Yes, I used a lunch meat or you could see it as an Italian city, which ever you choose. Moving on.

You have to shut it off and put your fingers to the keys. Even if you have to go to the box directly and switch it off. Give yourself a certain amount of time without it. You'd be surprised at how much you can accomplish. Then reward yourself--chocolate, ice cream, internet time . . . yes childish, but effective. I use the same tactic with my kids. They want video game time, they must read or do math problems to earn time for it. So I should do the same for myself.

Who's up for the challenge?

I will be in the querying trenches for a while. I'm not sure how long I can fight, but I have two novels that are ready. So, my blogging will be spotty. I'm not querying both at the same time. That would be crazy. I plan to do one then the other while writing my fourth novel.

What's new with you?

Have a great day!!

Trying to beat down fear.

Fear. Everyone fears something. You can't tell me you don't (if you don't tell me how). I have typical fears--fear of heights, spiders, the monster in my closet . . . See where I'm going with this. But I also have the fear of failure, rejection, blah, blah, blah. Heard it before, right?

As writers, we have tons of fears. Some of us can hide it better than others. When I first started this journey, my lack of "experience" made me, shall I say, naïve. So, I found myself more confident than I probably ever been. As time went on, and I gained more knowledge and experience, confidence started fraying and even breaking off to catch the breeze. It's odd, but something that I need to catch again.

It's not that I can't take the heat, I'm scared out of my skin to get back out there. Fear of rejection and that anything I produce is never perfect (yes, perfectionist here) is mostly the problem and it's freezing up my brain. I sit down to write and can't. It's frustrating and annoying. So I need a kick in the tushy. That's right, my tushy. I need a huge slap in the face to get motivated. To push through the blockade that's keeping my creativity hostage. Because lately, I've barely made baby steps. I'm trying to revise, and to be quite honest, I think I'm making the dang story worse (over revising possibly). I need to stick to something, ignore the internet and all opinions, and kick some story writing butt.

So give me your motivations. Your advice on pushing through and sticking to it. And how to scare the fear out of you.

Have a great day!!

Moving on.

Yeah, it's been a while and I missed IWSG. What's happening to me? Anyway, life has gotten in the way a little. I went on vacation with the family and any millisecond of time I get is writing. And yes, I'm still writing. I have a nervous pit in my stomach because I'm debating on whether to query any time soon. It's like a stroke of anxiety created a force field in front of my confidence. It's not easy to step back into the ring when you where defeated.

The thing is you have to get back up and fight. I know what I write is never "what they are looking for." But deep down I can't give in because I'll lose and it's game over. Who wants that? Why let others define what makes you happy? It's all subjective no matter how you look at it. Someone will always have something negative to say. It's their opinion.

It seems I always take the hard way no matter what I do. So I have to accept that it will take me longer. That's all. It will take me longer to find the one "who gets it." At least that's what I keep telling myself.

Trudge forward with my head high and stand behind what I write. If no one likes it, oh well, move forward and write on.

Alright, so who attended WriteOnCon? Great conference!! Thanks to all who helped put it one.

Have a great day!!

Oh Summer

Holy cow I've been a bad blogger. It's summer people forgive me. Summer is one season I do love. Although, it took on a different meaning when I was younger, well BK (before kids). After kids, it's totally different. I still love the beach days and the warmer weather, but it takes on a different feel. I do like spending time with my kids, but like every other mom out there, at times, I need a break.

Now summer is tiring. I enjoy going places with my kids, watching their faces light up when they discover something new, but I'm tired people. I'm counting down the days till school. You see the other thing that happens is writing time is squished down to the size of a pea. For me, I'm a scheduled person and when my schedule is jolted for a long period of time, mama gets cranky. Writing is my outlet and makes me feel human. It's true. It's a part of me and when it disappears for long periods at a time, it equals one unhappy lady.

Since writing time is a tiny window, my brain begins to melt. Yeah melt. It basically feels like a monster has come and taken the creative part of my brain and is holding it hostage. But this will pass. I know it will. Every year I get my time back. It's trying to handle the time away from my writing. I feel like  the well in my head dried up. I'm trying to do little things, but even that is hard cause I can't focus right. I'm trying.

I try to put things in perspective. At some point my kids will be teens and won't want to talk to me or need me so I should enjoy this and I do. There are times though a break is needed for personal growth and that's what I have to figure out in the summer. I need to still learn how not to feel guilty about writing when my kids are home. If they are quiet watching TV or playing, (work with me it is a rare occurrence) I should jump in and write, but I can't focus cause I'm anticipating an interruption or the next Hunger Games in my family room.

Life is like this. Learning to spread yourself to others while keeping you happy. It's not easy and is always a work in progress.

How about you? If you are a parent, how do you keep a writing schedule in the summer?

Have a great weekend!!

Insecure Writer's Support Group

I can't believe a month has gone by. I know I say this every time I post for this group, but seriously, the months are passing by fast. Anyway, thanks to the amazing Alex J. Cavanaugh for hosting and organizing this wonderful group. Go check out the other lovely folks who participate.

 

 So, lately I've been out of touch. Mainly because I've been focusing on my writing. And now, I'm about to head down into the revision cave again. Yes, I got some feedback on my MS, and well, it's not terrible. Shocking for me. I do have some cleaning up to do and some things will change, but I actually have a story to work with. I plan to query this one. I'm not sure when. I'm trying to give myself a loose deadline, which I'll keep to myself . . . for now.

 

Last year, I pushed and pushed to query, and guess what, the story wasn't ready. I had written and revised that darn thing on and off for almost four years. I've learned a lot since then so my process is different and I'm more sure of my ability to put words on paper. I continue to challenge myself and grow as a writer. My focus is on my writing and strengthening, not solely getting an agent.

 

That was my focus before. If I got an agent, I would be respected and the non-believers would believe that I can. Where that can be true, I also must prove that I can . . .to me. You see, having an agent isn't the end. Sure, you have arrived and moved up the writing world ladder, closer to that publishing dream. But with that comes more demands, expectations, and pressure. The pros and cons do apply here just like they do with every part of life. But from what I've seen, it's also not all wine and roses. Things happen and getting an agent doesn't mean that you will be published or even remain together. Breakups happen. The thing is--nothing is certain.

 

What I do know is that I want this. I do. But I want to do it right. It doesn't mean nothing bad will happen, it means that's not my only focus. It's where I want to be at some point--when I'm ready. Of course, if an agent was interested in my work tomorrow, I'd be sending it ASAP. It just means my focus is writing, strengthening, and continue writing the stories I love. I will follow my path and not listen to those who don't believe. Cause one day, it will happen.

 

What's your focus?

 

Where do you want to be?

 

Have a great day!!

It's Friday . . .

Yep, it's Friday, and it's been raining on and off for days. It certainly doesn't help in my productivity department. Weather affects my mood. Anyway, I'm in limbo. It's that time in a writer's life where I finished a manuscript and it's out to betas for round one and I don't know what to do next. I wrote a query, which my computer lost (long story), then I wrote another one that I'm not super psyched about. It's the ho hum time. I want to write something new, but can't get into it and then I want to revise something old, but can't get into it. We all go through it. I'm anxious and annoyed. I need something to occupy this urge, this want. Drives me crazy, but it happens. It's part of the whole cycle. I'm reading a book, but I'm not fully feelin' it. You get the picture.

Anywho, a couple of things are going on.

1. Check out my beginnings links on YaLitChat in the Craft Masters group. Later in the month, the lovely Dianne Salerni gives her advice on writing the first chapter.

2. Write Club is up and open for submissions. It's a fun way to put a piece out there and get advice without anyone knowing who you are. D L Hammons is a wonderful host.

So what's new with you?

Are you in limbo too? How do you get writing again?

Have a great day!!

Insecure Writer's Support Group--the pay off.

It's that time again. I swear this past month flew by. Thanks again to the amazing Alex J. Cavanaugh for hosting this awesome group. Go check out the other participants after you read my post of course.

Well, I'm almost done line edits. Torture is the word for it, but it's part of the process. Take the good with the bad type thing. It's funny how your learn things. I still feel like I struggle with this part of the process, but I've been told that my hard work is paying off. Good to hear. It's like watching your kids grow up. You don't see a whole lot of change until you look back to pictures from when they were babies. And when you get someone who doesn't see them often, they marvel at the little buggers growth. Yeah, that's what's going on.

My point is--keep going, keep writing, keep pushing yourself. It pays off. It may not be all at once--the whole sha-bang. It can come in little treats. Think of it as small doses of the best chocolate. So savor it, it means you're getting closer and growing. There will be sections where the chocolate is out of reach, but when you keep going it will fall into your lap.

So what's your insecurity today?

Don't forget to check out the other fine folks.

Have a great day!!