I can't believe I'm posting again. Well, I am. I have to say things always have a bright side. It's something I'm learning to turn to. I'm quick to write my feeling down and post them though sometimes embarrassing. I think a lot. Trust me, my brain never shuts off. My outlook this year was to let everything go and move on, be more positive, because that's all you can do. Things happen for a reason. Some of which we may not like, but they are done for a purpose. Whether it's to make us stronger or show us how to improve. There are reasons.
My eyes have been opened and I'm finally at peace with who I am. I know where I want to be and I'm fine with where I am. My past is that--my past. Who I was and what I did only proves that I'm better person now and will be.
So look to the lighter side of things. . .always. People don't want to be around negatives. Trust me, I know.
Happy writing and have a great day!!
Wednesday, February 12, 2014
Tuesday, February 11, 2014
A public service announcement from the socially awkward.
I will admit it--I'm socially awkward. There. I said it. Many people find me strange. I know they do. The thing is--there are times, I just don't know what to say or how to even approach certain situations. It's a battle that I've had throughout my life. Mostly on the outside I can pull it off, but inside I'm cringing that I said something stupid or wrong. It's not that I don't like to talk to people, in fact over the years, I've gotten better, but I know there are times where I'm sure people think, "There's something wrong there." They retreat and become silent.
Another problem is trust. In the past, I put my trust into a lot of people only to be let down in the end. So I approach carefully to every encounter I have and when I feel threaten I go silent. It's not that that person is the problem or even did anything wrong, I curl up worried I'll be hurt again. So I stop and go into a dark cave.
I'm not sure how to cure it or even how to move ahead, but it's a battle and in the end I'm embarrassed and ashamed and lose many friends over the process.
Last year, I retreated, curling up in my hole. I tried to be silent because I was scared and embarrassed at my own writing. Why would anyone want to read my stuff? I can't get a request. But the thing is-- it's all in my head. I'm my own worst enemy. I worry too much how others see me than how I should see me. I follow the rules and I'm learning that it's not always necessary. This business is subjective so no matter how perfect I try to make my stuff, it may not get there because it wasn't liked due to personal preference.
I've been trying to break open my shell this year and throw all my worries to the wind, renewing old friendships and hoping I didn't lose too many. I'm approaching writing differently too. I focus on me. I try not to stay on social media too much and worry that I'm far behind and all the questions that come with it--why can't I catch up? Why can't I just get there? Where is that sign of progress? I will put that aside, the best I can, and move forward. Not letting what others say bother me, but take it as a lesson. Let it roll off as they say. I will put my needs first and not just please. I will because I know I can. I can't thank those who have supported me enough. They have been there through it all and my gratitude and support for them is all I can give.
I know I've been posting about my feelings a lot on this journey, and well, I don't have much to report so I'm trying to figure out how to proceed with this blog. I can't devote as much time as I once did. I will update on other events and writer stuff, but I had meant for this to be a place where other writers could come and maybe find that they are not alone. To share their experiences through this process.
I don't want to keep posting things over and over again because let's face it--that's writing. It has ups and downs and ins and outs. Things take forever and they repeat, it doesn't always have happy endings that continue. So I will be thinking of ways to change a little but keep the essence of what I started with. I'm in a quiet period. I have some things in the works, which are great and have me smiling and I will talk about soon, but on the whole querying front, the crickets are chirping and maybe this book isn't it, which is fine. I'll move on quietly. Here's my motto for the year. :) Write on people.
Are you socially awkward too?
Have a great day!!
Another problem is trust. In the past, I put my trust into a lot of people only to be let down in the end. So I approach carefully to every encounter I have and when I feel threaten I go silent. It's not that that person is the problem or even did anything wrong, I curl up worried I'll be hurt again. So I stop and go into a dark cave.
I'm not sure how to cure it or even how to move ahead, but it's a battle and in the end I'm embarrassed and ashamed and lose many friends over the process.
Last year, I retreated, curling up in my hole. I tried to be silent because I was scared and embarrassed at my own writing. Why would anyone want to read my stuff? I can't get a request. But the thing is-- it's all in my head. I'm my own worst enemy. I worry too much how others see me than how I should see me. I follow the rules and I'm learning that it's not always necessary. This business is subjective so no matter how perfect I try to make my stuff, it may not get there because it wasn't liked due to personal preference.
I've been trying to break open my shell this year and throw all my worries to the wind, renewing old friendships and hoping I didn't lose too many. I'm approaching writing differently too. I focus on me. I try not to stay on social media too much and worry that I'm far behind and all the questions that come with it--why can't I catch up? Why can't I just get there? Where is that sign of progress? I will put that aside, the best I can, and move forward. Not letting what others say bother me, but take it as a lesson. Let it roll off as they say. I will put my needs first and not just please. I will because I know I can. I can't thank those who have supported me enough. They have been there through it all and my gratitude and support for them is all I can give.
I know I've been posting about my feelings a lot on this journey, and well, I don't have much to report so I'm trying to figure out how to proceed with this blog. I can't devote as much time as I once did. I will update on other events and writer stuff, but I had meant for this to be a place where other writers could come and maybe find that they are not alone. To share their experiences through this process.
I don't want to keep posting things over and over again because let's face it--that's writing. It has ups and downs and ins and outs. Things take forever and they repeat, it doesn't always have happy endings that continue. So I will be thinking of ways to change a little but keep the essence of what I started with. I'm in a quiet period. I have some things in the works, which are great and have me smiling and I will talk about soon, but on the whole querying front, the crickets are chirping and maybe this book isn't it, which is fine. I'll move on quietly. Here's my motto for the year. :) Write on people.
Are you socially awkward too?
Have a great day!!
A book to check out
Wow. I've been a bad blogger. Today, I will have two posts. The other post will explain a few things. This one is a book you must check out.
Pretty isn't it.
Title: CONTROL
Author: Lydia Kang
Pages: 400
Publisher: Dial Books for Young Readers
Blurb:
When a crash kills their father and leaves them orphaned, Zel knows she needs to protect her sister, Dyl. But before Zel has a plan, Dyl is taken by strangers using bizarre sensory weapons, and Zel finds herself in a safe house for teens who aren’t like any she’s ever seen before—teens who shouldn't even exist. Using broken-down technology, her new friends’ peculiar gifts, and her own grit, Zel must find a way to get her sister back from the kidnappers who think a powerful secret is encoded in Dyl’s DNA.
A spiraling, intense, romantic story set in 2150—in a world of automatic cars, nightclubs with auditory ecstasy drugs, and guys with four arms—this is about the human genetic “mistakes” that society wants to forget, and the way that outcasts can turn out to be heroes.
A spiraling, intense, romantic story set in 2150—in a world of automatic cars, nightclubs with auditory ecstasy drugs, and guys with four arms—this is about the human genetic “mistakes” that society wants to forget, and the way that outcasts can turn out to be heroes.
I thought this book was awesome!! Loved the voice and the whole world that was created. If you haven't checked this out, please do. It has a great pace and keeps twisting and turning with suspense.
Thoughts?
What are you reading now? Any recommendations?
Have a great day!!
Monday, January 20, 2014
Happy release day!!
The lovely Stina Lindenblatt is releasing her debut New Adult novel today. Isn't it pretty?
The stats:
Title: Tell Me When
Author: Stina Lindenblatt
Pages: 245
Publisher: Carina Press
Blurb:
Amber Scott should be enjoying life as a college freshman. She should be pursuing her dream of becoming a veterinarian. She should be working hard to make sense of her precalculus math class.She shouldn’t be waking up her college roommate with screaming nightmares. She shouldn’t be flashing back, reliving the three weeks of hell she barely survived last year. And she definitely shouldn’t be spending time with sexy player Marcus Reid.
But engineering student Marcus is the only one keeping Amber from failing her math course, so she grudgingly lets him into her life. She never expects the king of hookups will share his painful past. Or that she’ll tell him her secrets in return, opening up and trusting him in a way she thought she’d never be able to again.
When their fragile future together is threatened by a stalker Amber thought was locked away for good, Marcus is determined to protect her—and Amber is determined to protect Marcus…even if that means pushing him away.
Congrats Stina!! Can't wait to read it!!
Go check it out! Also, she has some giveaways on her blog.
Have a great day!!
Tuesday, December 17, 2013
Happy holidays!
Holy cow, I'm a bad blogger, but I've gotten a lot of writing done. I'm about 1/2 through my first draft of a new project and am in love with it. So we will see on that.
One thing I try to keep in mind this time of year is to live life a little. It gets hard when I get caught up in my manuscripts. All the other worlds that I create and characters that I breathe life into, it takes a lot of my energy and attention, but I have to stop sometimes and live reality. I know I've posted about this before, but it is something you have to do or you'll miss little things that matter.
There are times during this season that I get frustrated because I don't get my word count in or I can't think a continuous thought. It can make one grit their teeth and cringe, but these magical moments will be gone one day. Yes, my patience is being tried on all levels in real life and in writing life, it happens, I'm human. But I'm soaking it all in. I will finish this draft, I know I will. I'll revise and hopefully query it one day, but I also have to experience those moments so they can live in my memory too.
I hope everyone has a wonderful holiday and a happy new year!!
See you next year!!
There are times during this season that I get frustrated because I don't get my word count in or I can't think a continuous thought. It can make one grit their teeth and cringe, but these magical moments will be gone one day. Yes, my patience is being tried on all levels in real life and in writing life, it happens, I'm human. But I'm soaking it all in. I will finish this draft, I know I will. I'll revise and hopefully query it one day, but I also have to experience those moments so they can live in my memory too.
I hope everyone has a wonderful holiday and a happy new year!!
See you next year!!
Eat some cookies! Nom nom nom!!
Monday, November 18, 2013
Tea time with Failure
The funny thing about failure--it's everywhere. It's also not something you want to hear or admit. But it's always there--waiting. A bad word to many. A blemish to a blank sheet. To those who strive for perfection, it's the boogey man under the bed ready to strike fear. Let's face it, it will happen to you. More than once. It comes in all shapes and sizes from a simple thing to something that will not only affect you but many, maybe thousands or millions.
So, I sat down with failure and poured a cup of tea. What is failure really trying to say? Is failure that bad? I guess it depends on how big it is, but I stepped back for a moment and really let failure tell me. It seems I've misunderstood it. Sure failure hurts that's how it gets your attention. And at the time that it strikes you may not know why until a later time. I'm talking possibly years. That's where the misunderstanding comes in. Failure gets blamed for a lot of things, but it's the victim that needs to pay attention and turn failure around. Send him packing. I will admit failure has entered my life on many occasions, more than I like to state, but it wasn't until recently when I really looked at it--with my own two eyes and not from others advice, although that doesn't hurt the situation--it softens it. Spins it. Allows perspective to set in.
What is failure really trying to say? Try harder? Do better? Learn more? That's part of it. It's also trying to say that nothing is perfect. There's always room for improvement and everything is flawed. Sure there's a normal but believe it or not that's left to interpretation. Failure is trying to tell me there is another way. It's not my time. Failure never said to stop or not try. It simply is guiding me another way.
That's where it gets foggy. I need to know a clear path. I don't like the unknown. That's why failure is scary. It's messes things up and cuts your yellow brick road in half, blacking it out, making it seems like it leads to nowhere. The only way to get back is to keep going, try something different, learn something new--grow stronger. That's what life is--isn't it? Growing and finding out who you are. Failure has to be there to make sure that happens.
My thoughts for today.
How is everyone doing?
Have a great day!
So, I sat down with failure and poured a cup of tea. What is failure really trying to say? Is failure that bad? I guess it depends on how big it is, but I stepped back for a moment and really let failure tell me. It seems I've misunderstood it. Sure failure hurts that's how it gets your attention. And at the time that it strikes you may not know why until a later time. I'm talking possibly years. That's where the misunderstanding comes in. Failure gets blamed for a lot of things, but it's the victim that needs to pay attention and turn failure around. Send him packing. I will admit failure has entered my life on many occasions, more than I like to state, but it wasn't until recently when I really looked at it--with my own two eyes and not from others advice, although that doesn't hurt the situation--it softens it. Spins it. Allows perspective to set in.
What is failure really trying to say? Try harder? Do better? Learn more? That's part of it. It's also trying to say that nothing is perfect. There's always room for improvement and everything is flawed. Sure there's a normal but believe it or not that's left to interpretation. Failure is trying to tell me there is another way. It's not my time. Failure never said to stop or not try. It simply is guiding me another way.
That's where it gets foggy. I need to know a clear path. I don't like the unknown. That's why failure is scary. It's messes things up and cuts your yellow brick road in half, blacking it out, making it seems like it leads to nowhere. The only way to get back is to keep going, try something different, learn something new--grow stronger. That's what life is--isn't it? Growing and finding out who you are. Failure has to be there to make sure that happens.
My thoughts for today.
How is everyone doing?
Have a great day!
Wednesday, November 6, 2013
IWSG--Murky lake of writing
Well, not much is going on here. I finally got through that murky stage where you think you'll never write again or have an idea (whether it's great or not is undetermined). It's scary. It seems I go through it every time I finish a manuscript. I finally say a novel is done and a small idea comes but the characters don't speak. I think it's the brain telling you to stop and take a break. The remedy is--you should. Revising a manuscript for months can have your brain in knots. It needs to unravel. Of course when you're in the moment, it feels like an eternity. The end. No more words will flow. Patience eats at you.
But there is a light. That little pin hole that's making it's way through the darkness. See it. It's there.You're a writer so no matter what that spark will return. And that's where I'm at. The spark returned. Yes, I had my typical fit of "I will never write again because I suck and no one will ever want this," but I took a couple of days to send the brain to the brain spa and finally things are starting to flow again.
I'm still scared though. My last novel is going through the query process and I can't help but feel like I'm repeating my first experience, but I must go through it and be persistent to get anywhere. Right?So in a nutshell, I'm back on track. For now. I can't say that I will be a regular blogger but I'm still here now and again.
How do you make it through the murky blank lake of writing?
Have a great day!!
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