Thanks to Frankie for hosting the 2nd Annual No Kiss Blogfest. I missed this one last year so I'm glad to be able to participate this year. I can't wait to read the other entries. It may take me a couple of days, though. Thanks Frankie, you're the sweetest!
I originally was going to re-post something I had posted before, then I thought, no, something new. So I had something from my WiP#3 all ready to go, then this popped into my head on Thursday. Let me know what you think. It may turn into a story for me. My weakness is tenses so sorry if it's all screwy. Here is my entry:
My jaw cracked as his fist collided with my face. I stumbled back for a moment, stars flashing in front of me.
“Oww. You’re such a jerk, Reed.” I rubbed my cheek. “That was a cheap hit.”
“Cheap hit? Please, Gillian. You’re the toughest girl on the team, and you're going to cry now." He cracked his knuckles. "You’ve been hurt worse.”
“Funny.” I rushed toward him, jabbing my shoulder into his stomach. We both tumbled to the floor. I rolled to my side, sprung to my feet, and quickly held my fists up ready for his next move.
Reed grabbed his belly. “Lucky for you, I haven’t eaten lunch.” He swept his foot around catching mine. I landed flat on my back.
A horn blared. Sweat poured down my forehead, stinging my eyes. I blinked to focus.
“Since I won that match, I’ll be nice and help you up.” He held out his hand.
“I can get up myself.” I sat up, fixed the buckle on my boot, and stood, facing him.
He smiled, triumphantly. “How did you do on Professor’s Handy’s exam?”
“I passed.” The fabric of my jumpsuit, stuck to my back. I tugged on my sleeve, making it even with the other one. “Wipe that smirk off your face. We’re not done.” We walked in a circle, eyeing each other up. “What about you?”
“I passed.” He stopped and cracked his neck, his black hair flopped with each turn of his head. The horn blared again. “Ready for more?” The right corner of his lip, rose.
“Bring it.” I was out of breath, and my left calf cramped, but I had to continue. I had to win two out of three sparring matches to get an 'A' in self defense. Reed and I were in constant competition. Since grade school, we fought to be number one in the class, now in our senior year, it was more cutthroat than ever.
He lunged at me, taking hold of my upper arms. I pressed against his chest with my hands. His face turned red, and I dug my fingernails into his jumpsuit, ripping through the fabric.
“Hey." He pushed me back. “Stop with the cheap shots.”
“You started it.” Drips of red bled through the beige fabric. “At least now you can get a new suit. That one's ugly.”
“Like yours is any better.” He wiped the wound.
I blew a few strands of hair from my eyes. “At least mine's a pretty purple.” I crouched, swaying back and forth.
“Purple is a royal color. Perfect for the whiny, princess type.” Our bodies crept around in a slow circle again like sharks ready to kill.
“Ha. Beige is boring…Just like you.” My fingers twitched, anticipating his next move.
Reed charged, his fist aiming for my throat. I slapped it away with my wrist. Beige and purple blurs quickly flashed as we blocked and hit one another. I upper cut under his chin, and he let out a groan. My shoulder muscles tightened, trying to keep up. He was faster than he ever was before. A sharp pain ran up my back. The room spun, creating a kaleidoscope of white and yellow. Plastic and old dust smells created a cloud around my head.
I laid there staring at the ceiling, the dome lights gave off a halo effect when my eyes tried to adjust. My arms fell above my head, like dead weights. Reed straddled my stomach and slid his hands up to hold my wrists down.
“I win,” he said between breaths.
“I don’t hear... the alarm…that…states that fact.” I gasped.
Our chests raised and lowered, out of breath. His yellow green eyes stared at me. Over the past couple of years, those eyes have started to melt sections of my heart, unleashing feelings I don’t want to feel. I definitely didn’t want to show him, but here we were in one of those moments, a moment of my undeniable weakness.
His victorious smile faded and his death grip on my wrists loosened, allowing his fingers to press through mine. I wanted to move, knee him in the groin, I could win, but his face inched closer, pushing my feelings toward my heart. His breath tickled my lips. Tingles raced across my skin.
A screech horn sounded, red lights streaked across his nose. His eyebrows furrowed.
“That’s not the match horn.” He jumped up, still holding my hand, then pulled me up.
There is an intruder. Please move to a safety zone. A calm, woman’s voice came across the speaker.
Outside the door, people ran down the hall. I looked down at our hands, still clasped together.
Thanks again, Frankie. I hope everyone had a wonderful holiday. I'll start my regular blogging schedule tomorrow. Have a great day! Happy New Year!
Interesting! I liked the tension and the competition between them. Hard to come by (I THINK?). I like that this girl is seriously strong and can compete with him, but deep down she's also soft. It seems he is, too!
ReplyDeleteI was a little confused about WHAT they were doing. Wrestling? Karate? Maybe I missed that part! By over all, I think it was great and I'd love to read more. You ended at a peeerrfect cliff-hanger haha
Awesome job, Christine!
I like the competition and the tension, but the intense fighting threw me at the beginning. I'm assuming it's some sort of futuristic setting where they allow high schoolers to engage in full contact sports (my sons school has automatic suspension for throwing snow balls)
ReplyDeleteWould love more context - but like the scene.
I'm hooked. I liked your opening because it captured me and gave a twist. At first I thought "abuse" then I realized "competition". The relationship was fun because they'd been friends for a long time and now it's turned into romance. I also like that you ended on a cliffhanger because now I REALLY want to know what happens next. If you write more of this, I'd love to see it. :)
ReplyDeleteWow Christine, who knew throwing punches could be so sexy. Great job. Didn't even notice the tenses.
ReplyDeleteYou never let me down! I loved this piece, not to mention I love the characters names! You have a gift for words... you're like magic :)
ReplyDeleteooh this was my favorite one so far! I really enjoyed it and thought their dialogue was great
ReplyDeleteOoooooooo, I love this. Fast pace, tight writing and rising attraction, not to mention a great twist and fresh obstacle to that anticipated kiss! Quite wonderful.
ReplyDeleteThat's a great piece. I like the way the characters interact while they are competing /sparring verbally and physically. :O)
ReplyDeleteOh I have such a weakness for fight scenes leading to romantic scenes! The two types of tension lend themselves really well to each other. And more details on this would be great. Plus you added in a whole other source of possible danger at the end:) Nice job!
ReplyDeleteWow, I thought it was a great fight scene! Loved the childish banter between them as they sparred. Where are they? Why do they have rather brutal self defence sessions? Who or what is intruding? Makes a great teaser for a great story!
ReplyDeleteLove this! I like the fact that you are showing a strong girl here and I love the idea of the competition, not just physically, but also verbally. Great job!
ReplyDeleteLoved the competition and how it ended.
ReplyDeleteLoved this. I love the tension. :)
ReplyDeleteI really liked all the physical action. They were both going for the jugular, yet the attraction was ever present.
ReplyDeleteA fantastic read,
Michael
The competitive fighting and the attraction melded well here. I want to read more. I want to see them kiss!
ReplyDeleteQuick question though. What exactly were they doing? It sounded like some sort of martial arts?
Very wel done- there was tension, build up and honestly I think you could make a pretty good story! Go for it and thanks for posing!
ReplyDeleteNice. I like that they are competitive, and both strong-willed which always leads to high conflict.
ReplyDeleteGreat use of setting to increase the tension in this scene! You gave us great characterization in such a small space, too, without anything being intrusive. Well done.
ReplyDeleteI loved this. It makes a great fight scene too. The pacing was great, the conversation funny and the emotions real.
ReplyDeleteCurious about the intruder alarm.
I like how you stuck this in the middle of an all out fight. A friendly one, but still. And great place to cut it off, not just because of the almost kiss, but with the intruder...so intriguing. Great tension.
ReplyDeleteIt took a while to click that they were supposed to be fighting - as you no doubt intended. I assume that they are agents (CIA sort of thing?) at the end of their training? It was nicely paced and had all the elements of tension, humour, mystery and romance. Fantastic read!
ReplyDelete:Dom (My No Kiss)
Ah, I love badass girls. They are the best. And mix them with a sessy brunette boy....ariel like. :) Great work!
ReplyDelete